[UVG] Session 10 – A Good Old Fashioned Dungeon Crawl

All illustrations are by Luka Rejec for The Ultraviolet Grasslands.

Dramatis Personae

• Marcy. Grapefruit nomad Steppelander. Light-bending illusionist, amateur camel matchmaker, furniture fight emcee.
• Astia. D.W.A.R.F. Decapolitan Ambassador. Biomancer owner of the Buried Delicatessen.
• Finn. Greenlander Preacher from the Emerald City. Body-slammed an armoire. Talks to plants, wants to kiss a girl.
• Limon. Lime nomad Steppelander play-fighter. Bound in servitude to a demigod Bonsai Turtle named Glum.

Map I pulled from Dyson

Catching Up

As Marcy walked down the hidden staircase behind the embassy's mobility tubes, Astia reached into his pack and produced a tortoise. Slowly, it transformed back into its original form: a young Steppelander named Limon. His pact with Glum had its benefits. Marceline (disguised as an amnesiac Spectrum Satrap) was given paperwork to fill out in order to have her personality backup restored, but used the opportunity to meet up with her companions in the basement instead. With everyone together, the crawling resumed.

Hearing footsteps on the other side of the door Finn was attempting to open, Astia ran back into the hexagonal pool room with the Delicate Seer. He grabbed the unconscious body of the scientist they'd knocked out and plopped it into a chair, giving the impression of a napping researcher. Marceline disguised Limon as a Spectrum Satrap, so when the six guards emerged from the other side of the door Finn was trying to unlock they were only mildly suspicious. Why were three scientists standing in a pitch black hallway? 

Tensions nearly boiled over as the party failed to convincingly lie to the guards. Marcy claimed to be in the phytomancy division, but the guards knew phytomancy and seer divisions didn't intermingle, and no one could explain why they were in the hallway instead of at their stations. Astia finally managed to calm the guards down by implying that Marcy had come for a reading from the Seer with regards to the outcome of her "work." The six armed Rainbowlanders continued on their route through the facility.

Exploring Under the Final Embassy

Waiting for the patrol to exit earshot, the party pushed further into the underground facility. They found themselves in an aquarium room featuring a tank full of darkly occluded water taking up the entire north wall. Some glo-crystal wands attached to the glass tank via metal hookups recharged when electricity pulsed from somewhere deep within; Astia chalked it up to (electrically delicious) steppe eels and they pressed onward.

Sidling down a sloping hallway curving southward, the party found themselves at a crossroads. A stairway on their left headed toward the smell of dark phytomancy (care of Marcy's magical sniffer), but the room their current hallway emptied into was filled with swirling, multi-colored light patterns. Tempting as the lights were, the party decided to bee-line for their goal and came across an employee lounge. An end table's drawer hid a stash of cat coffee Marcy promptly pocketed and there was little else of interest other than a powered-off vidycrystal screen buzzing like a tube tv. They swapped it back on to find a looping text crawl in a language only Astia understood: Satrap Canto. Much of the feed referenced mundane goings on in the Last Serai, but an update on "the situation in The Violet City" caught Astia's eye. Apparently Purp. U had been swallowed by thorny vines on which bloomed blood orange orchids—the same kinda as Gelato brought back from Ynn and requested the Astrobotany department plant. Probably just a coincidence!

Continuing on, the group was faced with a crystal iguana sitting lazily atop a stack of crates in a storage room. From around a corner, guards could be heard making small talk, but Marcy smelled the source of the dark phytomancy nearby. It was coming from a hallway between their current location and a guard post. Our heroes successfully executed an "act like you belong here" plan, walking by while making casual mention of what they had learned from the vidycrystal news feed. It brought them to their destination: a jungly, vine-choked room at the far end of the facility.

The Lair of the Mind-burned Thief

Finn whispered to a nearby palm tree, hunched under the room's too-low ceiling, asking if it had seen anyone or anything suspicious in the room. Being a tree, it informed her that it had never seen anything ever, which triggered a brief conversation about exactly which senses plants were capable of experiencing. (I think I'm going with sound and touch. The creepy worm-vines can taste, but I think it's clear they're an exception.) This palm tree hated its life in this awful underground room and begged Finn to dig it up and plant it elsewhere. Moving further into the room in search of evidence of foul play, the party was ambushed by a bunch of worm-vines. 

Three of the nasty flesh-colored vines swarmed Marcy and began draining her blood through their lamprey mouths. One began to burrow into Astia's torso damaging his armor, but he managed to prevent it from fully tunneling into him. Marcy showered her legs in sparks from her crystal focus, singing herself but getting the worm-vines fully off of her while Limon went to town with his dagger-axe. Finn splatted one worm-vine with his staff and stabbed another with the poisonous spur he'd gained as a mutation in Ynn. It fled and though he pursued, it died before he could interrogate it. Limon continued hacking these bloodthirsty vines into pieces until only one remained, which Marcy used her bow to pin to the ground. Finn spoke to it, discovering the location of their spawning grounds: a person kept alive by some enchanted, yeasty rose water. 

They found the poor soul with his chest cavity full opened, worm-vines growing from within. Astia squished the baby worm-vines while Marcy found a helmet and uniform indicating that the body had once been one of Black Helmet 60-plurality's. An attempt by Finn to heal the unfortunate soul resulted in his passing (a kindness, truly). 

Astia found a hidden passage up to the surface in the back of the room. The party collected the BH60-p corpse and whatever else they could find that might serve as evidence and skedaddled. To avoid suspicion while traveling back through the Harmonium, Marcy disguised the corpse as a Ynnian rose maiden using her Light magic, and they made it back to the anarchist collective.

Epilogue

Sodoba Purpureo hadn't been certain Marcy and her friends would survive their attempted infiltration of the Final Embassy, let alone that they'd be back in a few hours with a fresh corpse. Our heroes hadn't discovered enough to put every last piece of the puzzle together, but they'd learned enough to know they were in over their heads. Clearly the S. Satraps and P. Princes were in on it together (whatever it was) and going to either with their findings was unlikely to produce a desirable outcome for them. They gave Sodoba everything they found and told her how to get to the trap door leading to the surface, leaving her with a sole instruction: once she's verified their claims, burn the place.

Everyone resolved to leave the Last Serai as soon as possible. A lone palm tree reassured itself Finn would be back to save it as smoke filled the phytomantic chamber.

[UVG] Session 9 – Belly of the Beast

All illustrations are by Luka Rejec for The Ultraviolet Grasslands.

Dramatis Personae

• Marcy. Grapefruit nomad Steppelander. Amateur camel matchmaker, furniture fight emcee.
• Astia. D.W.A.R.F. Decapolitan Biomancer Ambassador. Friends with the world's greatest Fleshcrafter.
• Finn. Greenlander Phytomancer Emerald City Preacher. Body-slammed an armoire.

It's Been

One week since learning that Lacquer Stone 4-body purchased large amounts of rose water from an Oranjian merchant, our heroes had planned their next steps. Astia assisted Anise of Star with his research into the Skull of Rot while Marcy and Finn made a contact within an underground zine operation working out of the Harmonium.

The Crystalline Seed

Hitting the books confirmed Anise's suspicion: the enchanted skull found in Jonky Bonko's locker was indeed the Crystalline Seed left behind on earth when Rot, the god of biomantic flesh manipulation ascended to the cosmos. Astia and Anise learned that the skull requires six bodies sacrificed to break its six seals:

• A Rainbowlander
• A Steppelander
• A Cat Lord
• A Spectrum Satrap
• A Vome
• And a Vile, void-travelers once known as Elves. Very few known to exist.

Anise of Star discovered a new purpose for his life and resolved to roam the world in search of sacrifices for the skull. Astia made him promise that he would only use willing sacrifices, to which Anise agreed with the stipulation that he would take what he could get when it came to Viles. Having no use for it anymore, Anise handed the keys to the Buried Delicatessen to Astia and left the Last Serai with Basil of Planet.

Sodoba Purpureo and the Anarchist Collective

Marceline and Finn spent the week utilizing the fashion sense they picked up from spending so much time at YOUR LIFE BURNS FASTER IN THIS HOUSE to spot (fellow?) revolutionaries. Their efforts paid off in the form of a new contact: Sodoba Purpureo, a Violet City expat working on an anarcho-collectivist zine out of the Harmonium. Sodoba declined Marcy's request to convince her collective to "storm the Final Emabassy," but promised that if any of them were able to produce actual evidence she'd push their narrative hard as she could. Also, Sodoba's really cool and wears a clockwork balaclava.

What's that Saying About Plans Surviving First Contact with the Enemy?

Reconvening, the plan was simple: Marcy, Finn, and Astia would all disguise themselves as Spectrum Satraps (Marcy casting illusions on herself and Finn, Astia using body magic to literally change his form). Marcy would then approach the receptionist's desk and preoccupy them by asking about literally every service provided at the embassy while Astia and Finn snuck down the tube into the basement. Spells were cast, the operation was underway.

Marcy approached the receptionist desk and was greeted by a woman named Satrap 177 who immediately threw a spanner in the works by asking for her name. Everyone immediately realized they hadn't come up with aliases, and soon after realized that they weren't entirely certain how Satrap naming conventions worked. Marcy improvised "Satrap 572" and the receptionist told her to wait while she sent a message into the brass pipes reaching down into the basement. The receptionist then demanded an explanation as to why Marcy had given her a made up name, to which Marcy replied that she was suffering from amnesia. It took some convincing, but the receptionist eventually bought the story and began trying to figure out how to restore Marcy from a backup, a thing that Spectrum Satraps can actually do that Marceline assuredly was unaware of going into the operation. The receptionist apologized and explained that they were on high alert since a Satrap who works at the embassy was assaulted the previous week.

With the receptionist clearly distracted, Finn and Astia sprung into action walking at a brisk pace across the ground floor of the embassy toward the tubes in the back. An armed guard stood nearby and, when they were about to climb into the tube, asked incredulously why they weren't just using the stairs instead. Neither Finn nor Astia had a good answer, so the guard ordered them to identify themselves. Astia improvised "Black Diamond 420" at which point the guard immediately drew his gun and tried to pull off Astia's disguise. The guard was mortified when his assumption that Astia was an impostor proved incorrect; this was 100% authentic Spectrum Satrap (thanks to his advanced Fleshcrafting magic). Still, the guard was confused and demanded to know what some Satraps who didn't even know where the secret stairs were hidden had shown up and given him a made up name. Astia threw a hail mary: he put on his best top secret military official act and gave the guard the "Now Why Might That Be" treatment. It miraculously worked, and they were shown the hidden staircase behind the tube wells that Satraps use to travel less stupidly through the Final Embassy. They were in.

Below the Final Embassy

Finn and Astia were deep in hostile territory, behind enemy lines, in the belly of the beast. They descended the stairs to find themselves on a darkened bottom landing. Drawing glo-crystal rods from an umbrella stand, they crept over to a pit in the corner. Apparently, the tube they had planned to shimmy down moments before let out here: it was a trap, greased lower down causing unsuspecting interlopers to fall to their deaths. Listening at a door they heard footsteps and shuffling sounds. Finn peaked around the corner to spot a scientist-looking Satrap rummaging through some heavy wooden cabinets. Finn and Astia ambushed him, attacking with their bluntest instruments. He made a break for it but Finn cast a Levitation spell, effectively holding him in place while they interrogated him.

They learned the scientist worked tending to something called the Delicate Seer. He agreed to show them the Seer and lead them to the pool where it lives. Nearby was his research desk; he exchanged a journal full of his research notes for his life, and asked them to knock him out so he wouldn't be accused of treason or whatever. Finn obliged. After wading out into the cloud green water to embrace a synthetic egg full of post-human flesh, Finn and Astia saw potential versions of their future. Astia envisioned himself escaping successfully from the extremely dangerous situation in which they found themselves. Finn pictured himself kissing a girl for the first time.

The two crept down a hallway towards where they hoped to find evidence of dark phytomancy. They found a locked door at the end which Finn began to pick with his metal fingernails, but midway through the action heard the march of boots coming from the other side. We ended the session there, with sounds of an approaching threat and Finn's shiny metal fingernail stuffed into a keyhole.

[UVG] Session 8 – A Taste of Rose Water, a Smell of Wet

All illustrations are by Luka Rejec for The Ultraviolet Grasslands.

Dramatis Personae

• Astia. D.W.A.R.F. Decapolitan Biomancer Ambassador. Fast friends with the world's greatest Fleshcrafter.
• Marcy. Grapefruit nomad Steppelander. Amateur camel matchmaker, furniture fight emcee.
• Finn. Greenlander Phytomancer Emerald City Preacher. Body-slammed an armoire.
• Limon. Lime nomad Steppelander climate migrant. Bound in servitude to a demigod Bonsai Turtle named Glum.

The Negotiation That Went Poorly

Marcy and Finn sat at the bar of the Giving Cow, the former filling in the latter on the stakes of the upcoming meeting. Astia was a negotiator by trade, but he was on his way to a club in the Harmonium called Gentle Whisper in order to keep mercenary group The Dangerous Ballad busy for the evening. The teens ran over their relevant knowledge:

• They found two skeletons with fleshy worm-vines in the cupboard of their hostel room.
• Marcy saw worm-vines in the aftermath of her barista's "static overload" incident. 
• Black Helmet 60-plurality denied the existence of any such creatures.
• The orange Satrap 57 confirmed that no mention of worm-vines was made in BH60-P's report of the incident.
• Underneath the Final Embassy, the atmosphere was humid and the smell of plant magic suffused the building.
• Satrap 57 took great umbrage at the unspoken suggestion that dark phytomancy took place in the Final Embassy's basement and pleaded with our heroes not to go to BH60-P with their evidence.

There was also their goal to consider: the group will be heading further westward soon, which inevitably involves moving closer to Spectrum Satrap seats of power. So they wanted to blackmail(?) the Satraps, but in a manner that wouldn't harm their potential relationship with the faction. Astia paid the hefty $10 cover charge to get into the club with the cadre of mercenaries unaware that he himself is the bounty they seek. Satrap 57 arrived at the Giving Cow.

RAW SEWAGE

RAW SEWAGE, the Giving Cow's Dwarf Biomancer bartender and owner hadn't intended to eavesdrop on Marcy and Finn's conversation, but through pure proximity had absorbed enough to understand that these kids were in some kind of serious trouble. They moved to a booth once their guest arrived, but even half the bar away, he could tell things were not going well. 

Then, inspiration struck. 

Whoever this orange guy was, he was threatening RAW SEWAGE's friends (probably, or something), so RAW SEWAGE sabotaged some milk and sent it his way. From over the Satrap's shoulder he indicated that the milk was drugged to the best of his ability. He was confident Marcy and Finn understood, but knew for sure that they couldn't confirm mid-conversation. It'd be too suspicious. So he sauntered back over to his station and waited. Sure enough, Satrap 57 took a couple slurps of the white stuff and was face-down on the table moments later.

After the commotion made by Finn and Marcy's surprised, panicked reactions RAW SEWAGE offered to hog tie the satrap, but the teens had a better idea. They would take him back to their hostel room, Finn would run and grab Astia from the club, and they would trick Satrap 57 into thinking he'd simply partied too hard in celebration of a successful negotiation. It was air-tight!

A Master Class in Burning Bridges

After hauling Satrap 57 up to the hostel Weekend at Bernie's style—miraculously raising no suspicion along the way—Finn ran to the Harmonium while Marcy waited in case 57 woke up earlier than expected. The Greenlander raced through the cramped hallways of the serais arriving at Gentle Hush to find the Dangerous Ballad playing a game involving digging coins into the table. The losers had minor cosmetic features swapped around by Astia's flesh-stitching magic. Finn breathlessly explained the situation to Astia, cleverly disinteresting the mercs by explaining away Astia's required absence as pertaining to teenage romantic drama between Marcy and Limon. In need of alcohol to plant on the satrap, Astia bought a bottle of Karma Joose from the club (at a disgustingly inflated price), sneakily putting it on Jimmy the Shark's tab before ditching him and his goons for the night.

The two made it back with minutes to spare before RAW SEWAGE's drugs were expected to wear off. Limon had shown up at some point with the same aloof demeanor he always wore, either unaware or uncaring of the peril at hand. Ah, youth... Anyway, Astia and Marcy splashed the drug-infused alcohol on their unconscious guest and rubbed a little on his imbibing tube. He awoke understandably confused. They told Satrap 57 their planned lie: the negotiation had gone so well that they had decided to toast to a beautiful new friendship. One thing lead to another and, well, here he is in an unfamiliar hostel with no recollection of the entire last night's event (they lied about it being a day later to him despite only a couple hours having gone by). You see, Karma Joose is kinda like Goldschläger, except instead of gold flakes it features a suspension of karma dust, a drug (and valuable trade good!) that induces amnesia; it's essentially a party-drink for people whose intention is to not remember the night. Satrap 57 was incredulous to say the least that he would intentionally order such a drink after an event that's pretty important he remember. Despite Astia's encouragement, he excused himself from their hostel and headed back to his quarters in the Satraps' serai.

Is this what those things look like?? God I hope not

Finn had another chat with the fleshy worm-vines while everyone figured out their next step, asking about the master, the "mind-burned thief," and the whereabouts of their origin. Possessing no sense of sight, the best the plants could offer was that the mind-burned thief "tastes of rosewater and smells of wet." 

Less than confident in their plan's execution, our heroes decided to find someplace else to crash for the night at the Buried Delicatessen. 

Aftermath and a Return to Scooby Doo Stuff

While Astia studied the Skull of Rot with Anise and Basil instructed Limon on how to properly categorize and sort body parts, Marcy and Finn decided to check on RAW SEWAGE. He'd shut down the Giving Cow after the incident, and no one had heard from him since. They got his address from Anise and paid him a visit.

Arriving at the depressing quarters, Marcy and Finn found themselves in a cramped drycoral hallways and staring at a flimsy, thin, wooden door. No light could be seen under the door (there were no windows, as the apartment's underground) and if RAW SEWAGE was home, he wasn't responding to their calls. Finn used a metal fingernail to pick the lock, and the two entered the darkened abode. To the right, a door laid open—just a crack—leading into a darkened room. Marcy pushed the door fully open from a safe enough distance to narrowly avoid the bucket of acid balanced atop it, but still found herself in the sights of R.S.'s rifle. He gave Marcy to the count of five to prove she was who she said she was (Spectrum Satraps are powerful illusionists, according to him) before he'd open fire. 

They satisfied his standard of rigor by shouting about how he winked at them from over the Satrap's shoulder, something their shared adversary couldn't have known. He invited them to crash at his place, which was a boon to all as Marcy's lack of sleep requirement allowed her to keep watch all night while the others slept. Eventually Astia and Limon got worried and regrouped, having to jump through similar hoops to satisfy the increasingly paranoid Dwarf milk-slinger.

Everyone headed back up to the surface mid-day to further investigate the mind-burned thief who tastes of rosewater and smells of wet. When they arrived at the hostel they found their shared room's door kicked in and off its hinges. Opening their skeleton cupboard, Finn found his phytomantic friends fried, laser guns by the look of it. Sleeping elsewhere that night had been a wise choice after all. Everyone asked around the bazaar for anyone selling and/or buying rosewater; when they found their man, they learned that his biggest buyer was none other than Lacquer Stone 4-body... Black Helmet 60-plurality's boss. 

Could this be the answer they sought? 

Will they discover the identity and motivations of the mind-burned thief? 

IS dark phytomancy actually being practiced beneath the Final Embassy? 

Should the party just dip set and get the fuck out of this place while they still can?? 

Some or all of these answers and more, next time on UVG.

[UVG] Session 7 – There Is No Dark Phytomancy Occurring Under the Final Embassy

All illustrations are by Luka Rejec for The Ultraviolet Grasslands.

Dramatis Personae

• Limon. Lime nomad Steppelander climate migrant. Bound in servitude to a demigod Bonsai Turtle named Glum. Owner of a strikingly wide-brimmed pale green wizard hat.
• Astia. D.W.A.R.F. Decapolitan Biomancer Ambassador of the Cobalt Ziggu-Rot. Making more Biomancer friends than anyone should be comfortable with.
• Marcy. Grapefruit nomad Steppelander Black Gold Industrialist. Budding cat coffee dealer, amateur camel matchmaker, furniture fight emcee.

Deep In the Underbelly of the Last Trading House

...our heroes convened at The Buried Delicatessen. The den of biomancy felt about the temperature of a Subway toppings refrigerator and featured body parts drained of blood, hanging from meat hooks amidst and above the half dozen or so unoccupied ka-boxes. Anise of Star eyed the Skull of Rot eagerly and confessed his expert opinion on the artifact to Astia: this, he surmised, was the long-awaited Crystalline Seed. A gift from their mutual god to his followers on earth. Anise offered the group free ka-box sessions and a full facial reconstruction for Marcy's mouth situation in exchange for the skull. Astia understood well the power of this artifact, but knew that its application could prove... problematic, what with the un/willing sacrifices and whatnot. An artifact conveys power, undeniably, but so does instantly getting on the good side of the known world's foremost expert in one's chosen field. Potentially even moreso than the skill itself. Astia agreed and the party's nettle burns and chemical coughs were healed overnight.

Rejuvenating as six or so hours in a ka-box may be, our heroes had nonetheless stayed up into the wee hours of the morning and sought refuge back at their hostel. At least a couple hours of shut-eye would be better than nothing, save for Marceline who no longer requires sleep. Before they left, Limon asked Anise for employment who acquiesced. He needed a bouncer, and someone to index his increasingly scattered collection of preserved organs by quality. Anise also offered Astia a position as research assistant while he further studied the skull. While everyone else retired to their beds, sleepless Marcy headed for a coffee shop.

Everything was Going Okay Until the Barista Exploded

Marcy sat reading a magazine at Crystal Rebirth, a coffee shop in the Harmonium she had spotted during her previous day's exploration. Commotion from the hallway outside the front doors caught her eye. An orange Spectrum Satrap was being rushed into a pod by a pair of necroamblers, which in retrospect are probably supposed to be zombie-like creatures but I decided in the moment were dog-sized spiders comprised of sewn-together human legs made animate. The Ultraviolet Grasslands, baby! Moments afterwards, the barista came to collect Marcy's empty cup and hadn't even finished if she'd like a refill before erupting into a shower of gore, painting the formerly cozy spot with blood and viscera. Marcy screamed.

Responding to the horrified shrieking, 10 humanoid figures wearing matching outfits and hercules-beetle-shaped masks of black porcelain rushed in. Four of them began questioning Marcy about what had happened and what she had seen, introducing themselves as Black Helmet 60-plurality; the others pulled out black batons and began beating to death two writing, rosy flesh-colored wormlike vines writhing about in the muck that had once been a coffee shop employee. After taking down her account, the poly-cop (polyce??) assured Marcy that it was merely "static overload," nothing to be concerned about. She tried to point out the worm-vine things, but Black Helmet 60-plurality refused to acknowledge them, and having sufficiently beaten all evidence of them into a nasty paste marched off in uncanny unison. Marceline needed a bath.

She soon found a kindly old woman willing to lend her a helping hand despite everything. No one else would make eye contact with the blood-soaked and shaken teenager, with the vast majority of folks taking one look at her and promptly pulling an about-face, noping off as fast as possible. Katya took her up to a makeshift hovel in a storage room and introduced her to a friendly janitorial gelatinous ooze who Marceline agreed to let clean her. The ooze felt like hydrogen peroxide and her entire body an open wound, but you couldn't argue with the results. A squeaky clean Marcy thanked the ooze and the old lady, trekking back to The Last Trading Hostel to inform her friends of what had transpired.

Getting to the Bottom of Things

Things had become suspicious-er and suspicious-er, and now it was time to piece together the clues and crack this case. Skeletons with worm-vines, a Spectrum Satrap rushed into a privacy pod, a barista exploding with worms inside, "static overload," Porcelain Prince Police cover-ups... they decided to head over to The Final Embassy's Cultural Center to learn about Spectrum Satraps and their history. 

He may have stood out better had I remembered about the tentacle arm. Oops!

Unlike the Last Trading House and Harmonium serais, the party found the Final Embassy a spotless, hermetically sealed affair. The sliding glass doors opened with a "pssshh" sound and the inside smelled like a freshly opened tube of tennis balls. At the wide, curved receptionist's desk sat... another orange Spectrum Satrap. Not recognizing the fellow, Marcy began interrogating the receptionist about the incident she had witnessed earlier. Information was requisitioned via a brass tube extending into the floor below their feet, but while the Satraps had a record of the event, it contained no mention of worm-vines. The Spectrum Satrap introduced himself as Satrap 57 and strongly suggested they not pry too hard into this whole worm-vine thing. It was probably just static overload. Leave it alone! Satrap 57 sent a necroambler to show them the way to the Cultural Center on the second floor. 

The horrifying leg-beast ambled on over to the back of the room where it began cautiously mounting the inside of a glass tube extending both above and below the serai's ground floor. Satisfied that it was as well-situated it was going to get, it spider-climbed its way up to the second floor. The party looked bewilderedly up after the bizarre creature as it ascended slowly and awkwardly.

The only way to get up to the cultural center

It was everyone else's turn to follow. Astia and Marcy deftly performed the athletic feat, but (surprisingly) Limon slipped, sliding slightly below ground floor before regaining his grip. To his surprise, the air was humid and smelly down there, a far cry from the sterile, heavily filtered air of the above-ground floors. Stranger still was that rather than a natural mixing of the two floors' gasses, a distinct yet unseen barrier separated the humid below from the clean above. Limon climbed his way up to the cultural center and shared his findings with the others. 

Now less concerned with the word salad technobabble nonsense displayed on the plaques ("During the Decadent Poly-chromatism movement of the Savenger Polities, it is said that Every Spectrum Satrap Died" and so on and so forth) and more with the mounting mystery of the forbidden basement (signs in 12 different languages said "do not enter" more or less), the group discussed their options. Should they sneak into the basement? Cause a distraction to distract Satrap 57? Would they get in trouble or be killed? Armed guards were out back overseeing the unloading of marrow-beet from the colossal prismatic walkers stationed outside... would there be time to escape before they reacted? After speculating all this and more, they noticed the necroambler observing them. It then dashed off toward the mobility tube, but in its rush to get back to the front desk, slipped and fell who knows how far into the darkness Below. Limon, Marcy, and Astia decided it was time they all left.

A Tense Negotiation, Scheduled

On their way out, Satrap 57 got a buzz from the tubes heading below and chased after them, but only to the border between the Final Embassy and the Harmonium. Marceline mentioned smelling magic from below at which point the Satrap exasperatedly denied—perhaps a bit too preemptively—any and all accusations not yet made of Dark Phytomancy being practiced below the Final Embassy. The group threatened to go to Black Helmet 60-plurality with their newfound information unless the Spectrum Satraps made it worth their while. Decidedly opposed to this outcome, Satrap 57 agreed to meet them at a neutral location to discuss terms. He also made Astia swear a D.W.A.R.F.en vow they wouldn't divulge any information prior to the meeting; he agreed. They scheduled the meeting for that very night at the Giving Cow.

Upon arriving at the Giving Cow, however, our party found a group of familiar yet uniquely unwelcome faces: The Dangerous Ballad. Once again, the goons hired to hunt them down were playing their betting game around a glass of putrid toxic milk. Being the only party member who the Dangerous Ballad did not possess a description of, Astia nobly chose to get them out of everyone else's hair. He flashed his wad, impressing the goons, and offered to take them out on the town for the evening. Excited to leave the dump and hit up a nicer joint for once, the mercenaries left with him post-haste, walking directly past Limon and Marceline who were standing by the entranceway to the milk bar. Marcy quickly pulled Limon into her embrace and planted one on him so as to not expose their faces to the bounty hunters. The goons chided them, but passed by without IDing the macking teens. They had lost their best negotiator in exchange for removing a serious problem, but Marcy had a greater concern on her mind.

Sparks had flown.

[UVG] Session 6 – How to Make Friends in Alien Places

All illustrations are by Luka Rejec for The Ultraviolet Grasslands.

Dramatis Personae

• Finn. Greenlander Phytomancer Emerald City Preacher of the Good Word of the Great and Powerful Physics. Subterranean lifeguard extraordinaire. Body-slammed an armoire.
• Astia. D.W.A.R.F. Decapolitan Biomancer Ambassador of the Cobalt Ziggu-Rot. One more step and he'll be farther from home than he's ever been before.
• Marcy. Grapefruit nomad Steppelander Black Gold Industrialist. Budding cat coffee dealer, amateur camel matchmaker, furniture fight emcee.
• Gelato. Mutant Quarter-Ling Hexad Enforcer Militant Were-swan. Canonically still only wearing a labcoat with the front unbuttoned.

Probably my single favorite drawing in the entire UVG

A few days out from their destination, the party got caught in a nasty static storm kicking up radioactive dust. The resulting dry cough made restful sleep hard to come by, which compounded with the nettle burns from the Porcelain Citadel to make quite the uncomfortable experience. They arrived at the Last Serai Inspector's Outpost in poor shape, where they met Georg. Having no trade goods for the half-elf to inspect, Astia asked Georg if he knew of any biomancers at the Last Serai. Georg consulted a dusty old tome and, upon confirming that biomancy was not illegal, "only frowned upon," regretfully informed the fleshcrafter that he knew of no biomancers within the serais. Astia took umbrage at the slight, but Georg said it was legal for him to discriminate against the practice despite holding public office because it wasn't a religion. Astia convinced him to have a chat over drinks and the inspector agreed, suggesting The Giving Cow, a milk bar in The Last Trading House.

After stabling their caravan, our heroes sought lodging at The Last Trading Hostel and were being shown to their room when a scream rang out. Investigating, they found a young boy crying next to a skeleton that appeared to have fallen out of a cupboard. A rosy, flesh-colored vine entangled the skeleton, its tendrils penetrating to the marrow; they opened the cupboard's other drawer to find another skeleton similarly envined. Finn, recognizing these slug-like meat-vines as being both plants and alive, spoke to them using his unique phytomancy skills. In exchange for their lives (Finn promised nutrient-rich soil) the vines confirmed that they supped on the flesh and marrow of these victims, admitting they were "brought to be" by "the mind-burned thief." Supping on things seemed like their whole deal. No one liked it. The little housekeeping boy made a rude comment about pitbulls so Finn chucked him back into the cupboard with the skeletons and vines to teach him a lesson. He emerged thoroughly traumatized and shouted to his boss he was taking a smoke break.

The lady at the hostel's front desk discounted their room (on account of the corpses) but offered to comp their entire stay should they solve the mystery of the former guests' murder. Mysterious, unsolved deaths are bad for business.

Serai Shenanigans

Wandering about The Last Trading House, Marcy found one empty room with graffiti on the walls and another with padded walls and doors leading to ever smaller padded rooms like some kind of bizarre architectural matryoksha doll before bumping into Georg again. She sold him some cat coffee, but peaced out when he started wondering aloud about its legality. Asking around, she finally got a lead on the whereabouts of Pooki, the Cat Lord to whom she'd been referred all those weeks ago back in the Violet City: she lived above the milk bar (cat's gonna cat).

Everyone regrouped to find Astia and Gelato at the Giving Cow, the latter still retching after losing his lunch drinking a glass of explicitly labeled radioactive milk. Astia, meanwhile, talked shop with RAW SEWAGE, the establishment's D.W.A.R.F. bartender (they pegged one another for biomancers on sight). Asking for leads about the skull he found in Jonky Bonko's locker, RAW SEWAGE told Astia to stay in the bar after close. Finn then took the quite ill Gelato back to their hostel while Astia and Marcy went to go find Pooki.

The Dangerous Ballad

Our heroes arrived at Pooki's office to find the door ajar and the Cat Lord in a seemingly heated discussion with a buncha gruff looking dudes wearing purple bowling shirts. After the guy doing the talking slammed his hand down on Pooki's desk, the lot of 'em stormed out, pushing past Marcy and Astia without paying enough heed to potentially identify them. The duo entered and met their fluffy-haired liaison, fur white as the ghost ash of the Death-Facing Passage but with piercing gold eyes. She had been riled up by her previous encounter, but her mood lifted when they named Galavar the Green Mage as he who had sent them. It just so happened that he was an old friend and she owed him a big favor... so they asked her to refine their ruby golem heart into an autogolem battery and she agreed. It would take a few weeks, but she would only charge them for labor: $400. A pittance! Pleased with the exchange, they headed back down to the Giving Cow to hang out until closing time.

When they arrived, however, they found the gruff four from before engaging in some kind of machismo-based betting "game." Having read the flyer these goons had left with Pooki, the party identified them as the mercs hired to hunt them down by a mysterious Cat Lord in the Violet City named Uda. The flyer featured detailed descriptions of Limon, Gelato, Marceline, Dulce, Noble, Orphan, and Lancer as well as their caravan, targeting specifically the small-headed rhinobuffalo. Marcy used her light manipulation abilities to disguise herself as her alter-ego Greta and Gelato as Ernest Borgnine, and the group entered to confront their pursuers... with subterfuge.

Gelato: more than meets the eye

After a bit of tough-guy showboating, the members of The Dangerous Ballad introduced themselves: Clifford, Burg, and Stephan were lead by Ripley the Shark. Astia played toxic-milk chicken with them for a while to get in good with them, trying to throw them off the trail by providing them with a (technically, mostly true) "rumor" that their prey could change their appearance at will. Another violently ill toxic-milk-drinker vomiting had RAW SEWAGE questioning why he even sold the stuff. Astia met up with Georg and they became friends, with Georg promising to be more tolerant and open-minded in the future. 

Eventually things quieted down and the bar emptied out in time to close at midnight. It was then that the bartender beckoned to be joined in the back room.

We Have the Meats

A horrific, corpulent, multi-uddered flesh abomination hooked up to a sputtering machine via suction cups and a series of filthy tubes, RAW SEWAGE revealed, covered a secret trapdoor. Pushing the unspeakable throbbing sack of flesh, fat, and glands aside long enough to provide access, RAW SEWAGE lead our heroes deep down a ladder through a drycoral-porcelain tunnel below the bar. When they reached the bottom, they found themselves in a corridor facing a heavy vault door. Their guide approached to utter a secret passphrase and granted them access to The Buried Delicatessen. 

Therein they met Anise the Star, perhaps the Decapolis' most (in?)famous biomancer. Astia produced the Skull of Rot after a quick introduction and Anise positively lit up, wry smile spreading slowly across his meticulously designed and sculpted facial features. 

[UVG] Session 5 – Jonky Bonko is Dead, Long Live Jonky Bonko!

Dramatis Personae

• Marcy. Grapefruit nomad Steppelander Coffee-maker. Dipping her toes into camel matchmaking.
• Astia. Dwarf Decapolitan Ambassador Biomancer. Learned Flesh-crafting at the Cobalt Ziggu-Rot. Arms and legs like twigs.
• Finn. Greenlander Phytomancer Emerald City Preacher of the Good Word of the Great and Powerful Physics. Member of the Teen Squad.
• Limon. Lime nomad Steppelander climate migrant. Bound in servitude to a demigod Bonsai Turtle named Glum. Owner of a strikingly wide-brimmed pale green wizard hat.

In the Aftermath of the Furniture Fight

Everyone stood staring in stunned silence at the Unsettled Waters. Frightened and shocked onlookers scurried back off to their various hovels in the town proper while the last burbles of what once was Jonky Bonko rose to the surface of the lake and vanished. One audience member lamented aloud the strict laws set by the tyrannical Porcelain Princes—if only furniture fighting hadn't been illegal they wouldn't have had to hold the fights in such hazardous places! He left for Your Life Burns Faster in This House. 

The party were approached by Ipa, Jonky's adolescent Rainbowlander manager. On the verge of a breakdown having lost her livelihood, she perked up at Limon's mention of his play-fighting days in the Yellowlands (assisted by Marcy's hype-man act). You see, Ipa had already promised to provide a fighter for some upcoming furniture fights, but with Jonky presumably eaten by a gigantic octopus she was going to owe some dangerous people some cash. The party decided to help out in the way they knew best: throw a charity furniture fight in Jonky Bonko's memory. And thus, the First Annual Jonky Bonko Memorial Furniture Fight was born. They had a week to plan this event and find a suitable piece of furniture to fight. Our heroes stole over to the late Mr. Bonko's house in the middle of the night to raid his locker and acquire a sofa for Limon to fight as the main event.

Chez Bonko

Peering into the window of the hovel to which Ipa had given them directions, they saw three women sleeping on a sofa next to a standing locker. Deciding honesty was the best policy, Marcy and Astia knocked on the front door which was met with expectant calls of Jonky Bonko's name. When the front door opened, no words were needed; the girlfriends knew that Jonky had died. Mary Mince swooned while Berdonante asked Marcy and Astia about the fight. Eventually the rest of Jonky's (former) girlfriends awoke and came into the common room to meet the party. In total there was Berdonante, Mary Mince, Fache, Egaree, Cruse, Larmoyante, Plure, Epuise, Aveguele, Priere, and Angoisse. Jonko's prior polycule was dismayed but unsurprised to hear word of his death; they knew the risks of furniture fighting, and who was to blame for those risks. Damn the Porcelain Princes!

The mood lightened when our heroes made mention of the First Annual Jonky Bonko Memorial Furniture Fight. Everyone agreed it was a good idea, and the girlfriends even donated their own sofa for Limon to fight. Rooting through Jonky's old locker, Marcy found some particularly curious items: a chitin shield with biomechanical snakes interwoven, a skull with runes inscribed (which Astia identified as curses of his god Rot), and a highly illegal long-gun that fires bursts of radiation. How Jonky Bonko came about such items, who can tell? The life of a furniture fighter seems anything but dull.

Triumphantly, the party dragged off Jonky Bonko's girlfriends' couch into the night.

The Week Before the Event

Camel Speed-Dating Round Two

Turns out the second time's the charm because only an hour or so into their next round of speed-dating, Marcy's magnificent camel locked eyes with one of Zora's low-born regular camels and it was camel love at first sight. Sparks flew and not even Zora could deny it, so a deal was a deal: Zora unwittingly traded Marcy's ill-gotten small-headed rhinobuffalo for a regular camel and $400. Before their time together was up, the Spectrum Satrap confessed to Marcy that she had originally planned on selling her out but now considered her a friend. 

Your Life Burns Faster in this House

Everyone spent the week hanging out at the revolutionary house in order hoping to get permission to hold their big furniture fight in its back yard. Getting to know the guy who "runs" the house, Syruss Sensible, and greasing the wheel to the tune of $100 each got them two things: permission, and a radical new fashion sense. During their time at the house, they heard increasingly intense anti-Porcelain Prince propaganda in the form of daily speeches delivered by Syruss, and Marceline continued to smell magic coming from behind the false wall in the "dungeon" below. Syruss tried to convince the party to hold the furniture fight on Porcelain Prince territory as a show of defiance, but they were having none of that.

The First Annual Jonky Bonko Memorial Furniture Fight

It had finally arrived: the night of the fight! A week of hyping up the event between Marcy, Ipa, and The Girlfriends had drawn a decent crowd, and they were ready for some carnage. Astia convinced the crowd that an armoire had killed Jonky Bonko, and this very armoire was to fight Finn (under a pseudonym, of course) as a grudge match. With the crowd sufficiently hyped, the event was underway.

Finn cleverly used Forcebending magic to make the armoire weightless, pulling off an impressive series of stunts while keeping the fight from being too one-sided. The crowd wasn't going to believe that the armoire what killed Jonky Bonko would be taken down easily by some no-name furniture fighter, and Finn sold it beautifully. After trading blows for a few minutes, the armoire pinned Finn in a surprising reversal; he was down for the count. Jonky would not be avenged just yet!

Up next was the main event: Limon was going to fight a sofa by himself. Most people had heard of 3-on-sofa or even 2-on-sofa fights, but no one had seen a teenage boy fight a sofa alone before. Cash ran rampant between betters and bookies while M.C. Marceline readied the crowd and introduced Limon. They had dressed the sofa up in a porcelain mask to increase the crowd's ire; it worked swimmingly, but Marcy had another trick up her sleeve. Tapping into more arcane power than she had ever previously harnessed, she gave the couch a gnashing, toothy, illusory maw, making it look much more evil than before. The spell got out of control, however, and she was mutated, gaining a larger maw herself. Nevertheless, the show must go on!

Limon whipped off his poncho and wide-brimmed wizard hat to reveal his "play-fighting" outfit: a spandex speedo. He rushed over to the couch and began wrestling with it. An overeager attempt at an early pin tweaked his shoulder, but he fought through the pain. In an amazing display of raw strength, Limon got low, got his hands under the couch, and lifted. His arms wobbled for a moment and he nearly dropped the sofa—the crowd gasped, some looked away—but digging into his deepest reserves for a boost of strength he hoisted the entire rabid couch high above his head. The onlookers went full tilt riot posse wild. Limon slammed the sofa down, driving it back towards the hard earth. Marceline tossed him his dagger-axe and he finished the job to uproarious applause.

Wow, This Actually Worked?

Yep. Marcy made a Spectrum Satrap friend, Astia found an important artifact of his revolting god, and Finn and Limon fought furniture convincingly enough to raise money for Ipa to pay her debts and Jonky's polycule to be taken care of. The event ended with The Girlfriends helping our heroes carry that armoire over to a nearby defense pillar and throw it into range of its death-ray laser, exploding into a delightful pyromantic display. Everyone partied at the faster life burning house for the rest of the night, deciding to set off towards the Last Serai in the morning.

[UVG] Session 4 – Of Porcelain and (Sweet) Princes

All illustrations are by Luka Rejec forThe Ultraviolet Grasslands.

Dramatis Personae

• Finn Skyshambler. Greenlander Phytomancer Emerald City Preacher of the Good Word of the Great and Powerful Physics. His silvered bracelet signifies his membership in the Teen Squad.
• Marceline Chaiya Grove. Grapefruit nomad Steppelander Coffee-maker. Her Teen Squad bracelet is uniquely socketed with a chrysoprase gemstone.
• Dulce. Mononymous Gentlemanly Bourgeois Botanist Dwarf from the RLD. All his hair fell out, but he's glued it back on while waiting for it to grow back.
• Astia Rudeni. Dwarf Decapolitan Ambassador Biomancer. Learned Flesh-crafting at the Cobalt Ziggu-Rot. Arms and legs like twigs.
• Limon Field. Lime nomad Steppelander climate migrant. Bound in servitude to a demigod Bonsai Turtle named Glum. Owner of a strikingly wide-brimmed pale green wizard hat. Hasn't taken a single point of damage yet this campaign.

The trip west from [REDACTED] did not treat our heroes kindly. Fiberglass thermo-nettles plagued the path (just that time of year, I guess!) and most ended up with serious burns. Marcy managed to avoid the worst of it.

Vome Hunter Golem with adult Spectrum Satrap for reference

A day out from their destination, The Porcelain Citadel, a group of three hulking white humanoid golems caught sight of the party and approached. Dulce identified them as Vome Hunter golems, so no one in the party had anything to worry about... unless the golems' scanners malfunctioned. Finn used his phytomancer skills to ask the nettles for help, who happily obliged, entangling two of the golems. The third approached and scanned everyone in the group save for Astia who flew above with his butterfly wings.

Satisfied that no one in the party was secretly a vome in disguise, the sole remaining hunter golem ambled back to its nettle-bound companions. It would not be long before the crew spotted the citadel, throwing the horns over on the horizon.

YOUR LIFE BURNS FASTER IN THIS HOUSE

The first sight they saw when passing into the territory of the Porcelain Citadel was a ramshackle hut with "YOUR LIFE BURNS FASTER IN THIS HOUSE" spray-painted in a variety of offset colors on its facade. A man in a white seersucker suit smoking a cigarette sat on the porch and hailed the party with a bunch of incoherent new age adjacent hippie dippy nonsense. Dulce did not trust this man, but everyone else was lured into the house by its colorful lights and window-rattlingly loud music.

While Dulce's suspicion grew, Marcy smelled magic coming from the basement and spotted a bouncer standing in front of a door leading downward. The bouncer told her she needed a consenting partner to go downstairs, so she grabbed Limon and they descended into what turned out to be a sex dungeon. Astia refused to find a partner, insisting he should be allowed into the sex dungeon by himself, so the bouncer refused him entry and called him a creep. In the sex dungeon, Marceline traced the source of magic to a room hidden behind a back wall, but decided to hold off on investigating so as to not get on the house patron's bad side... for now.

The Ballad of Jonky Bonko

The party was approached by a short, lean man wearing gaudy, mismatched, fake jewelry as they reconvened on the porch of the house where your life burns faster while in it. He introduced himself as Jonky Bonko, furniture fighter and tour guide extraordinaire, and offered to show them around town for $20. When everyone declined, he instead offered to tell them something "useful" for $100, or something "interesting" for $50. Dulce talked that $50 down to $30 and some cat coffee, and Jonky informed everyone that some mercs were looking for information on a group of people traveling with a small-headed rhinobuffalo (just like the party's!) only a few days ago. He tossed in that their uniforms implied they were on the payroll of a Cat Lord from the Violet City, but no one asked which one.

Happy with his payday, Jonky invited everyone to come see a furniture fight of his; midnight at the Onion Dam by the Unsettled Waters. Limon and Finn had lost interest a long time ago and wandered into the settlement proper, so Dulce and the Hexads looked for a spot to hide the rhinobuffalo while everyone decided how to approach the "being hunted" situation.

Limon and Finn Versus Royalty

Approaching the Citadel itself—a colossal sign of the horns made of flawless, unmarked porcelain—Limon and Finn were met on the steps by a cluster of seven identically dressed men and women wearing matching porcelain masks. They introduced themselves as Sherd 7-extension, a Porcelain Prince, and asked what business the lowly monobodies had at the Citadel. 

When Finn and Limon were unable to provide a satisfactory answer, Sherd 7-extension ordered them to leave under vague threat of enslavement. Shaken but unstirred, the teens left the Citadel to seek work elsewhere.

Marcy and Astia Are Royalty

Meanwhile, Marceline and Astia traveled past the Vavilov Velvet Orchards and spotted a curious sight indeed. A 100-person polybody wearing military uniforms and identical gargoyle masks running drills in the fields nearby. The Porcelain Prince Clayfire 100-company recognized Astia from a prior ambassadorial meeting and halted their exercises to greet him. Marceline had used her light-bending abilities to disguise herself as an older woman who she introduced to Clayfire 100-company as simply "Greta."

While catching up with the Porcelain Prince, Astia and Marcy noticed something odd. While mostly speaking and acting in perfect unison, some of their bodies seemed to "de-sync" either saying something similar but not identical to the rest, or falling behind a few milliseconds. Strange behavior!

Astia mentioned to Clayfire 100-company that he was planning on spending time at Your Life Burns Faster In This House during their stay at the Porcelain Citadel, to which the Prince fiercely balked. Clayfire 100-company explained that that house was full of revolutionaries and thus were not to be trusted; they instead extended full hospitality to the Bluelander Ambassador. The Prince then polity excused their selves, as they needed to return to drills. Physical fitness and mental acuity are of the utmost importance!

Camel Speed-dating

Everyone reconvened at the rhinobuffalo hiding place to find Dulce, Noble, and Orphan laughing at Lancer's newest trick: dropping his trousers and hanging his bare ass over the Still Waters lake and getting his butt bit by an Electric Steppe Eel. The group decided that their best course of action was to launder their bioengineered burdenbeast at the Two Serais market and headed that way.

Imagine this but with a bunch of tubes coming out of it and probably some spikes too

At the market, Dulce's eyes grew large as dinner plates at the beautiful sight of oldtech Vechs being loaded, unloaded, and in some cases straight up displayed like at an auto show. He headed over to a big ol' biomechanical Lincoln Continental and talked shop with its owner, a mechanic by the name of Lazaro Romero. While this happened, Marcy began negotiating with Zora Namelost-67, a Spectrum Satrap burdenbeast merchant specializing in camel placement.

Negotiations began heated as someone questioned Zora's last name, a practice which she both hates and experiences often. After smoothing things over, Marceline initially hoped to sell their small-headed rhinobuffalo for above its Kelly Blue Book value, but Zora talked her down. Ultimately, they came to a conclusion: she would trade in the rhinobuffalo for a normal camel and $400 IF they could find a camel that wouldn't be intimidated or depressed by the party's Magnificent Velblod camel. Zora needed to see sparks fly; these camels needed to like each other, otherwise no deal. If no sparks flew, she would simply trade the rhinobuffalo for a different burdenbeast of similar or equal value. Marceline and Zora headed over to her camel pens to begin introducing Darius (the magnificent camel) to her hundreds of camels, hoping to see sparks fly.

Scarcely halfway through Zora's camel harem with no sparks yet, the day grew late and both parties decided to retire for the evening and continue in the morning. Having developed a rapport with Marceline, Zora extended an invitation to stay with her in the Serai if she didn't have a place to crash for the night.

Tragedy at the Furniture Fight

Excited to catch a good old fashioned furniture fight, the group took Jonky Bonko up on his offer and met at the Onion Dam at midnight. Watchers gathered little by little as time went on until, by the light of the moon, the undercard matches began. Ottomans were smashed, a wardrobe pinned a rainbowlander into submission, and then it was time for the main event. Jonky Bonko took on a dinette set in a series of brutal rounds of no-holds-barred combat.

After seeming to gain the upper hand over the matching table and chairs, Jonky was suddenly and dramatically driven backwards out of the ring entirely! The fight took him precariously to the Onion Dam bridge itself... where a gargantuan Stone Octopus tentacle emerged from the Unsettled Waters, smashing the dinette set and wrapping itself around Jonky Bonko. Before he could even cry out for help, the singular tentacle pulled him into the waters. Most onlookers fled through the night back into tower, but those who stayed saw the last trace of Jonky's existence: 27 dollars floated up to the surface of the murky lake.